Five months have passed since my beloved was taken from me, and every day I think…
Any day now, life will become normal… but I never even catch a glimpse of normality. I try desperately to do things which will eventually lead down the road towards coming to terms with the new reality, but Nothing seems to help. I paint. I enjoy the process, I enjoy the finished product but it doesn’t fill the empty void I have inside my soul. I have been through the process before, rebuilt my life before. But I was young. Roads had signposts.
Now I am old and cannot see the signposts… I’m spiritually myopic, and furthermore, I don’t want to go forward, I want to go back to her. I want my soulmate. There! it’s all so simple. I want to turn the clock around, reverse out of this reality. I want a quantum time where this hasn’t happened.
There! Five months gone and I’m no closer to getting a normality. I’m still homesick for my lover, for the palace of us, and not the morgue of me!